He just doesn’t want to meet up

What to do with a man who’s hard to pin down for a date?

You’ve been chatting with him for weeks, you’re even still pining for him, even if he just cancelled a date at the last minute. You just want to see him, he’s got that something, you’re not sure what it is. And the less you hear from him, the more the longing intensifies. He’s busy with work (which you totally understand, of course), he’s got some issues with his ex, he’s hesitant because you don’t live near each other, he’s not feeling very well right now. You accept them all, those bullshit excuses.

The big question is: do you even want to give your precious time and fun company to this man?

And if so: why? He’s clearly not as great as you think.  Is it because of those beautiful pictures that make you swoon? Is it the image you created of him in your head (for which, after all, you have plenty of time)?

This is only the beginning, or rather: the pre-beginning. How would things be after being together for a few years, if it ever came to that? The start of a relationship needs to go smoothly. Complex situations, problems and possible fights will arise after some time, those are a given. A dream team will experience beautiful moments together, but must also be able to weather storms and hurricanes from time to time.

But this is not what the beginning of a relationship should be like, and certainly not the possibility of a beginning.

You don’t want any fuss, you just want to have a good, or ideally great, time together, and lay the foundation for a follow-up. And… of course, you should never chase after someone.

That’s why I wrote a chapter in my book called The Candy Store. That way, you make sure men chase after you. This candy store only works by kicking down the facade, not by leaving the door ajar.

The large variety of men to choose from will give you more confidence for the rest of your life, so it’s a win-win!

So what do you do if a man is moaning and being difficult? You take a dive in your candy store and meet up with someone else!